Memories
by CoralinaPlantain
Summary: What happens when the residents Wilson and Edwards find an abandoned baby in a box? Arizona is met with a feeling she hadn't felt in ong time... will this pain ever go away? (Crappy summary, sorry)


**AN:** I had this idea a couple of days ago thanks to that sneak peek of Arizona holding that baby. I hope you like it. Enjoy your reading.

**AN2:** If you're the spoiler free kind of person, don't worry, this story doesn't contain any kind of spoiler.

* * *

The day has been crazy busy at GSMH, since Dr. Wilson and Dr. Edwards found that baby inside a box in the back of the hospital, people hadn't stopped for a second.

Doctors, nurses... everyone had their attention focused on the baby boy. If not helping doing his exams to see if he was okay, gossiping about his story.

As soon as the baby was found, Jo and Stephanie ran to find Arizona, who was the peds doctor on call that day.

When she heard how the duo had found the baby, she felt something in her chest that she had never felt before... or had, but she didn't want to believe that pain was coming back again, it's been a long time.

After checking the baby, and comfirming that there wasn't anything wrong with him, she gave him to a nurse to clean him up and put some clean clothes on him.

After finishing her scheduled surgeries she went to the nursery to take a last look at the baby before leaving.

He had this beautiful green eyes, that different from earlier, demonstrate happiness. He was happy that someone finally took care of him, gave him a little bit of love.

Staring at the baby she couldn't help but think _"How can someone do this to such a cute baby?"_

And this wasn't the only thought that came to her mind. After staring at him for a little longer she couldn't help that feeling again, that longing for the baby she carried for such a little time.

How would he look like? Or she? Was it another girl? She wanted another girl... would she/he have her blue eyes? Her dimples?

She couldn't fight the tears...

As she was about to turn around to leave, she felt her phone buzz in her pocket.

**Hey, you still at work? I'll leave in an hour if you don't mind to wait. We can go to the grocery store and buy that wine you like ;) – Callie**

She felt a little smile forming on her face when she read Callie's text. But as much as she wanted to reply and say she would wait, she needed to go home, her safe heaven, where she could breakdown and no one would see it and gossip about it to the entire hospital, and she knew, the moment she saw Callie she wouldn't be able to hold it anymore. The feeling of failure... she just wouldn't handle.

* * *

As Arizona didn't reply her text, Callie assumed she had probably already be at home and fall asleep. Arizona had been working non-stop all day because of the "baby in the box". That's how people at the hospital named the young boy.

Arriving at home, their new home, she couldn't help but smile. A few months ago, she was sure she wouldn't get her wife back, that she wasn't caught up to be happy again... but like everything in her life, it had a plot twist and here they were. At their new start.

The idea of moving out of the 502, messed with Callie a little at first, despite the time, she still wasn't ready to sell Mark's place and to leave behind all the happy moments she'd spend in that apartment. But when she saw how happy Arizona was when they found that house, the smile she had missed so much, come back to her wife's face, she knew it was the right thing to do.

"Arizona?" She asks as she enters their room. "Where are you?" Nothing but silence meets her ears.

"Arizona, if this is some kind of joke you should know that it's not fun, you're getting me worried here. Where are you?" She says to the empty living room, once again met with silence. She was sure Arizona would be at home.

After not having any answer she goes to look for her wife in the other rooms. When she reaches Sofia's room, she can't help but contemplate her daughter's new room. The new rooms had a brigther color, squares of animals and dolls on the wall. The only thing that remained the same were the big letters forming "Sofia" on the wall.

After watching her little angel sleeping for not longer than a few seconds she heads back to her room, the only place Arizona could be since she isn't in the other rooms.

"Arizona, come on, answer me!" That's when she heard soft sobs coming from their private bathroom. "Arizona?" She called again, trying to open the door but it was locked. "Arizona, unlock the door."

At the other side of the door, sat on floor was Arizona, with her head between her hand in atempt to hide her sobs. She had heard Callie calling for her but she just wasn't ready to face her yet. But there comes a point when you can't avoid it anymore, so she took a deep breath and said, "Just a second." With her voice still shaked.

When the door was oppened Callie was met with the defeated look on her wife's face. "Arizona, are you okay?"

Without saying a word, the blonde just let her body fall into her wife's and let the sobs she was trying to hide, echo around their room. She knew she would breakdown when she saw Callie, and she wasn't wrong about that.

"Shh shh, it's okay." Callie said wrapping her arms around her wife. She didn't know what had happened, why her wife was like that, but she had to calm her. "I'm here, honey. It's okay." She said as she runned her hand up and down Arizona's back.

After a few minutes of crying into her wife's arms, Arizona let go of Callie's embrace and took a seat on the bed.

"You wanna talk about it?" Callie asked, her voice full of concern. Arizona just nooded.

"It's just that it's hurting... again." She said with her voice still shaky.

"Is it your leg again? I can help, let me adjust it."

"No, it's not my leg." She said looking into Callie's eyes. "It's not that kind of pain."

Callie stared at the blonde still without understand what she meant.

"I-I thought it would be gone forever after a while, you know? But it's still there, hidden, just waiting for an oportunity to appear again. And it hurts so much Callie, I can't take it, it just..."

"Arizona, what are you talking about?" She asks approaching her wife on the bed and wrapping her arms around her.

"That baby... the one Wilson and Edwards found today?" The brunette just nodded. "I took care of him, they took him to me so I could check him out, see if there was anything wrong with him."

"And there was? Is he okay?"

"Yes, he's perfectly okay." She replies with a calmer tone. "But that made me wonder... how can someone do this? Throw a baby away as if it were nothing. There are so many people trying to have a baby but they can't, so many people wanting to adopt a baby and... and instead of giving him up for adoption they just throw him away as if he was trash."

"Arizona..." She says softly, finally getting what her wife was talking about. Understanding what pain she was refering to... Callie knew that pain.

"We were so happy... it was really soon but I already could picture the girls running around the house, I had dreams of our family enjoying a weekend at the beach..."

"I know, honey... me too."

"I was so happy that day, you know? I was so happy that I was going to hear its heartbeat for the first time, just the thought of that melted my heart, I remembered how it was when you were pregnant with Sofia, that fast heart beats that warmed our hearts... I remembered that I stayed sat on that table for quite a while, I tried to call you because I knew you had probably forgotten since you were dealing with that patient. I wasn't mad at you, I understood. I still remember the cold gel on my belly and the smile that was on my face."

Callie tried her best not to cry, but she couldn't help but feel guilty for not being there to hold Arizona's hand when she needed her.

"But then Dr. Parish looked... and she looked, and she looked... but there was no heartbeat. At that moment, I felt my world fall apart. I stayed frozen, as if I couldn't move, as if I couldn't breath... and then, suddenly I was mad at you, but not because you weren't there, it was because I needed someone to be mad at and you were the chosen one. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream... but I couldn't, it was as if the life inside of had faded away," she said, staring static at the floor as the momories of that sad, sad day came running to her head.

"I'm sorry, Arizona," Callie said, holding Arizona tighter against her body. "I'm so sorry I wasn't there with you, that you had to go through this alone."

"What hurt the most was when I saw the smile on your face go away when I said there was no heartbeat. When you left me standing alone in that scrub room."

"I had to go away, I had to breakdown and I didn't want to do this in front of you. I know that at the time I sounded selfish but I was just thinking about you. I need to get away from you, to cry, scream alone. So that way, I could let out all the pain I felt I needed be strong for you. Because I knew you would need me more than ever. I just needed a minute to cry by myself."

"But you came after me later that day and you didn't want to listen to what I had to say."

"I was scared, freaked out to be honest. We had lost a child. I know it was you who was carrying it but it was my child too, it hurt more than I thought it was possible to hurt. I didn't even know it was possible to hurt for someone you didn't even get to meet," she says, trying to keep her tears at bay. "Now I just know it is possible."

"Did you forgive me?" Arizona asks in a whisper that is barely audible.

"Forgive you?" Callie asks confused.

"For having lost our baby..."

"Arizona..." She says with a calming voice, turning her wife to look at her, but the blonde just doesn't meet her gaze. "Look at me..." She says hooking a finger under Arizona's chin, lifiting it up so the blonde has to look her in the eyes. "It wasn't your fault, okay? It could have happened to anyone."

"But I-"

"No," She puts a finger to the smaller woman's mouth to stop her from talking. "You're not doing this, okay? You're not going to blame yourself. I know we've talked about this before and you didn't want to at the moment but... we can try again, whenever you feel like trying again. I know it won't replace the one we lost but this baby will be as much loved as the other one... and if you don't want to have another baby, like ever, it's also okay. We have a beautiful daughter that we love so much."

"That baby they found... made me wonder... how can someone do that to a child? We hurt so much because of the one we didn't even get to meet and someone just throws a perfect little baby away... it is just too cold. How can a human being do that to such a tiny human? It's not fair, you know...Why would God give this kind of person a child and not us?"

"Don't blame God for these people's actions, Arizona. Some people are so cold in the heart that not even a God's loved creature can melt that ice."

Arizona just stares at her wife, amazed by her words.

"What are they going to do with the baby?" Callie asks after a few seconds.

"They called social service, they're coming by tomorrow." She says, wiping a tear away."You have to see him, Callie... he is so, so beautiful. He was laughing so hard today that it warmed my heart, how can a little creature do that to someone?" She says with this small but still bright smile on her face.

"I actually saw him, everyone was talking about this baby and when I went to the peds floor to see if you still were at work, curiosity hit me and I went to see him. He is indeed really you know whom he made me think of when I saw him?"

"Who?"

"You." She answers with a big smile. "I don't know if you realized but he has super cute dimples, just like yours... and he has these green eyes that are so beautiful, like your blue ones."

"Really?" The blonde asks, meeting her wife's warm brown eyes.

"Really." Callie replies placing a kiss on the blonde's lips.

"Promise me you won't freak out when I say what I'm about to say?"

"Hummm," Callie looks at her suspicious. "Okay."

"Unfortunately he wasn't lucky enough to have a good mom, but he might be happy to have two moms with nothing but love to give."

"Arizona..." Callie whispers.

"We have a free room..."

"I-You-"

"Let's adopt that baby." She says with a bright happy smile, not letting Callie finish. After all the feelings they had just shared, she thought that maybe that baby could give them something they wanted so bad, and they could give the baby something he didn't have before.

"Are you serious?" Callie asks, jumping from the bed.

"I am serious, let's adopt that baby."

"Arizona, I-..." Was all she managed to say before jumping on the bed and pulling her wife closer so she could kiss her passionatly. "Let's adopt that baby." She said, getting a full happy laugh from her wife.

* * *

_**A FEW MONTHS LATER**_

"Ms. Torres, Ms. Robbins, I've got some great news for you." Their lawyer said as he took a seat across from theirs in the conference room.

"Well, you're making me curious." Arizona says as she puts her hand on top of Callie's.

They had started the process of adoption a few days after their talk. Of course there were a lot of things they needed to do so they would be considered able to adopt a child. The fact that they were a gay couple made things a little hard at first because the social worker was a bitchy bitch, but as soon as she saw how happy and well taken care of Sofia was, she loosened a little.

They had recivied a call from their lawyer earlier that day and went running to the hospital, hoping for some good news.

"Well, I am really happy to say that you've got the baby's temporary custody."

"What?!" Callie said not believeing what she had heard.

"He's... he's ours?" Arizona asked with tears already falling down her face, happy tears.

"You've got the temporary custody, but the way things are going, won't take too long for the judge to give you the permanent custody. Congratulations."

"Oh my God!" Callie yells. "Arizona, we-we're..."

"We're having a baby." Arizona says softly, kissing her wife on the lips.

"We're having a baby."

* * *

**AN3:** That it guys, what do you think? Let me know if you like it!

**AN4:** For thoso of you who read "The Deal", the next chapter is coming up this tuned ;)


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